Wednesday, February 13, 2013

WHAT TO GET HER



FORGET TO GET YOUR GIRLFRIEND SOMETHING?! DON'T FRET GET HER SOMETHING YOU WONT REGRET! Ha I tried to rhyme. 
1. UNO!!! If your girlfriend appreciates Jeremy Scott, she goes bananas over yellow faces, or if she has an unhealthy obsession with Bart Simpson she will love this. I am one of those three. Guess.
2. Okay, who doesn't love donuts? If my boyfriend gave me a box of donuts...wow...okay... words really can't describe how happy I would be. I love round pillows of glazed fat in my mouth.
3. These aren't just any Louboutins. These ones say SEX on them. Oh sheet I said it! I said it!
4. The rarest gift of all...a hedgehog. I don't even think it't legal in LA. 
5. "Baby, I will always support you."
6. If your girlfriend wears t-shirts like "I have a boyfriend" or "My boyfriends hotter than yours" she should further validate it by wearing it on her wrist. Jennifer Fishers "Taken" cuff
7. This artificial growing bonsai tree will blossom beautifully just like your relationship. Ew...that was cheesier than Wisconsin.
8. Brittany aka Photographer Girl aka bestie said she would love to receive Sasquatch Concert tickets. DISCLAIMER: If your girlfriend loves Pitbull or Kesha she probably wouldn't want these tickets.
9. Naomi aka Pony Girl aka bestie would love to receive a horse. That's really not too much to ask. 
10. Best for last! It's a marc by marc necklace and when you spin it, it says "I Love You"! Not as cute as the hedgehog of course. 

What's the black pair of shorts doing there? That's totally random.

Honestly, this crap is all materialistic and if I were to receive any of this I would most likely lose it; even the horse but maybe not the hedgehog.  February 14 2013 is just a date but YOLO! YOLO! YOLO!!! 

Monday, February 11, 2013

Most Overrated Month of the Year



Towards the end of January you will go to a supermarket and your eyes will be visually molested by tons of pink shit. There will be so many shades of pink its like Pantone raped your local Ralphs. 
Anyways, the real reason I'm writing this post is because I am obsessed with white dress shirts. I truthfully believe everyone should love it as much as I do and here are the reasons why....
  • I'm feeling "hella" chic today...WDS
  • I want to hide my belly fat...WDS
  • I love how I have no boobs...WDS
  • I want to look and feel effortless...WDS
  • I want to look as if I have a boyfriend and I am wearing his shirt...WDS
  • I am freaking awesome...WDS
  • I will wear some crazy pants beneath my...WDS
  • I want to hide my abnormally sweaty pits...WDS
And for the ones who don't have a "valentine" this year listen to the words of my good pal Kenrick Lamar "Fuk Dat!". Don't be a sad pathetic casualty of this overrated month! Last thing, I have no idea why I wrote about Valentines day and white dress shirts all in one post. Be happy and wear a wds on Valentines day even though you might look like your date...or not.